i slept in and woke to a migraine. so i lingered in bed for about an hour, drifting in and out of sleep and evading the sunshine cutting in through the bedroom curtains by pulling my sleep mask further down over my eyes. ear plugs in, i hoped the silence and the stillness (and the 4 tylenol) would make me feel well enough to face the day.
by 11am, i was done laying there. i wanted to know what my family was up to. i cleaned up, put on jim's favorite lotion (it's a floral scent, which i hate - but i wear it because he loves it), and headed downstairs. i was pleasantly surprised when i came around the corner and found my two guys in the living room. jim was at the far end of the couch with his laptop out, working as usual. i took a mental snapshot as i watched jackson crawl over him, jim setting work aside to be playful. the rare sunshine, streaming in through the windows in all directions gave me an instant boost of happiness as i walked in and joined them on the couch. i love my little family. we miss our older three (which are at their father's for one overnight every other weekend), but it's always nice to have this peaceful time with the son we had together....and now, little bun in the oven. one could call it a brief respite from the usual noise and chaos which has become our day-to-day existence in a home with four kids.
i'm 13 weeks and 4 days. i've been improving, and have had a couple good days, but overall i am still nauseous most of the time. I'm back to cooking meals for my family but feel queasy the entire time. i feel better when i am eating...which is bad, because i can't be eating constantly. i am not stressing about it, but at the same time, i don't want to give myself too much work to do after the baby is born (shedding extra weight and toning up). i miss zumba. i miss my zumba peeps. but i have felt their love and attention since i've been away...perhaps more than anyone else!
we had a trip to california planned for next weekend but decided to stay put. it's frustrating, because the military would fly us there for free - and how often will our family of six get to be on a plane together? it's expensive. we'd also get hotel and meals paid for....so it's a bummer to pass it up. hopefully there will be another event in the future. but for now, i just don't feel well enough yet. and i know we'd want to extend the trip to see the sights, see family, and eat at all those wonderful places we don't have here (in'n'out, mission burrito, la monica's..to name a few). all that yummy food plus a rental car and fuel....is money we could use right now. so, like i said, hopefully later there will be another opportunity. *fingers crossed*
i really hope that i feel back to normal in the next couple weeks. i've never been sick past 16 weeks. around that time, i should start to feel the baby moving around. i look forward to that. i look forward to my belly growing (although it's already crazy big right now, for how far along i am - i suppose that's because this is baby #5). around 20 weeks, we can find out the sex. we're hoping for a girl.
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