jackson's first snowball

the bod

i was just looking at my first belly shot and can't wait to have my body back! it's 3:30am and i am wide awake. i have insomnia, but that's just part of it - jackson is squirming around too much for me to catch any Z's anyway...

i am quite sure i'm done having children, although i have said that with every single one. still, i don't want my thirties to be filled with diaper-changes and all that. i love my children and also love having some freedom. i look forward to nursing again, because of the closeness...but i also kinda dread being "hooked up" every couple hours.

i want my bod back, not just so i can fit back into my skinny jeans (VERY excited about that), but also because i am already getting tired of the aches and pains and awkwardness. but even as i type this, i am telling myself to stop venting and just enjoy it...because i only have a few months left - and i may never go this way again. hmm. i may never go this way again...

so i am going to go back to bed, and enjoy jackson's kicks and wriggles 'til i eventually drift back to sleep.

concerns

so....i just realized that james' blotchy, bright red cheeks may very well be fifth disease. he came home last night, from his father's place, with bright red cheeks. he's naturally rosy-cheeked and it was cold outside, so i didn't think anything of it. this morning, the redness appears to be more of a rash with raised bumps. there was a scare about this a while back, when i heard of a friend's son having it (and we'd been hanging out). i didn't know anything about it until another friend explained how it can be harmful to the baby, during pregnancy. i have no idea if i am immune or not. luckily i have an appointment scheduled for tomorrow, so i can discuss it with my doctor. i'll probably get a blood test to make sure. i know the risk is low, but i still worry...